Voices in the Dark
by Maresia Eterna
Summary: /OneShot/ Now, there was absolutely nothing wrong about his son being locked inside his room with a beautiful girl. He would actually be proud of it, if it wasn’t for his bad habit of eavesdropping.


**Disclaimer:** _Bleach_ belongs to **Tite Kubo**. Nothing's mine.

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Okay, this is my first _Bleach _**one shot**. I tried to make it funny, especially since we all know how Kurosaki Isshin can be. I also want to apologize for the errors you'll find in every page; since **English** is my _**second**_ language, it's rather hard for me to correct the mistakes that I leave on every page before posting the new chapter.

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**Summary:** Now, there was absolutely nothing wrong about his son being locked inside his room with a beautiful girl. He would actually be proud of it, if it wasn't for his bad habit of eavesdropping.

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**Voices in the Dark**

As he took a deep breath, Kurosaki Isshin crossed both his legs and arms in apprehension. Beside him, was Masaki's poster, and after meditating about what he should do, Isshin glanced at the picture of his wife. He wondered what she would do...

"Ah, Masaki, what should I do?" Isshin questioned as he pressed his arms even harder against his chest. "I'm very proud of our boy, but at same time, he's so dense I fear he may end up doing something wrong!"

As he started thinking about what had happened a few moments ago, Isshin closed his eyes and dropped his head in thought. As soon as Ichigo had stepped inside the house, Isshin had welcomed him with a few kicks and punches that his son had managed to avoid…well, most of them anyway.

However, when a certain beauty had emerged from outside, watching them fight with a strange expression on her face; Isshin had been forced to stop his attack. He knew who she was; the gorgeous and always bubbly Inoue Orihime. Now, once in the presence of the young woman, Isshin had quickly turned to Ichigo, and expressed through small jumps and squeals how happy he was that his son had finally decided to find himself a girlfriend.

And, of course, as soon as those words left his lips, Isshin found himself lying upside down on the kitchen's floor, after a well-aimed kicked from Ichigo. Isshin could vaguely remember his son threatening him about not approaching his room no matter what, but since when did Isshin listen to his son?

And so, after a lot of pondering, Kurosaki Isshin found himself going up the stairs, his feet barely making any sound against the wooden floor. It was all about curiosity really. All he wanted was to make sure his idiotic son did not do something stupid enough to scare Orihime away.

She would such a nice person to have in his family…

As he did his best not to make any noise, Isshin finally reached the second story, and as quickly and soundless as he could, he made his way towards the door that lead to Ichigo's room. As he pressed both his hands and ear against the door, though, Isshin mentally asked for heavens for his son not to do something foolish.

"_So, when do you want to start, Kurosaki-kun?" _

That was obviously Orihime. Always looking after his son with such care, and Isshin could not help but feel moved at such insight. And she was always smiling, captivating everyone around her…everyone except for Ichigo, whose scowl was always present in his face.

"_Right now, before my stupid dad decides to come here, and annoy the crap out of me." _Ichigo answered, and Isshin narrowed his eyes slightly. He dared to call him stupid in front of a lady? Oh, he would pay… _"Besides, I really don't feel at easy doing this stuff, so…"_

_"It's okay; we can go one step ar the time." _Orihime answered, and for some reason, Isshin could say that she was smiling. _"Err…shall we sit on the floor?" _

_"Hmm, don't you think it would be better if we did it on the bed?"_at that, Isshin pressed his ear even harder against the door, and his mouth dropped when he heard the mattress squeak under the weight. _"We can see it better because of the window…"_

_"Ah yes, great idea, Kurosaki-kun!" _Orihime exclaimed, but Isshin was too worried about what could possibly be going on behind that door to notice the happy tone in the girl's voice. _"But you know I'm not really experienced, ne? Ishida-kun taught me, but…well, hehe, I'm still not very good."_

_"Bah, Ishida…I prefer your help to his, regardless if you're experienced or not. I would never see the end of it, if I had asked for his help." _Ichigo replied, and Isshin wondered about what they were talking about, _"Anyway, how are we supposed to do this?"_

_"Well…first we need to decide what we're going to begin with, but I think we should choose this first because it's very important." _Orihime started cautiously, and Isshin narrowed his eyes in suspicion again, _"Which one do you prefer, Kurosaki-kun?"_

_"Ah, I dunno, they all look the same to me." _Ichigo answered, and Isshin had to restrain himself from rolling his eyes. Leave it to Ichigo to ask for help, and not to do anything in return. _"Which one do you think it's better?"_

_"Well, hum, this one is really soft." _Orihime answered, _"And this one here has a nice colour. And hum…"_

_"Well, then we can use this one."_ Isshin heard the bed move, _"I have the feeling we're going to need a lot of this anyway. So, what are supposed to do now?"_

"_Now comes the hard__est part, which is to insert this in here." _at that, Isshin always fell on the ground, right on his face. Excuse me? _"It's complicated sometimes, I rarely do it right. Ishida-kun is the one who does this part for me."_

"_Well, if Ishida can do it, then so can I." _Ichigo answered, but Isshin was too busy trying to figure out what was going on, to cheer his son's determination. And when the bed shook again, Isshin almost fused with the door since he pressed his ear even harder against it. _"Ah man, this is more complicated then it looks! Bloody thing doesn't want to enter!"_

"_Ne, Kurosaki-kun, Ishida-kun always says that it's better not to get angry, because…ah!" _Orihime yelped suddenly, and Isshin had to restrain himself from opening the door of the room on that moment, _"Ouch, it hurts…"_

_"Hey, are you okay?" _Ichigo asked suddenly, and the mattress shifted again. _"Wait, let me do it."_

_"No, its okay, Kurosaki-kun," _Orihime started, _"I just forgot something very important when we started this. And hum…" _Isshin raised an eyebrow again when he heard a bag, _"Ah, found it. Ishida-kun always says we should wear this. He says it's better to use it from the beginning."_

_"And where the hell am I supposed to put that?"_Ichigo asked, and Isshin narrowed his eyes as he tried to picture what his son and Orihime could possibly be doing inside the room.

"_It's easy, __let me show it."_

Then there was a moment of silence that did not help Isshin to feel any better about what could possibly be going on, inside the bedroom.

"_Ahh!" _Ichigo said suddenly, and Isshin moved backwards so that he could now stare at the door in confusion. Why on earth had he not been blessed with X-raid vision? _"Well, I guess this makes sense. Hum…could we try it again, Inoue?"_

_"Sure!"_Orihime exclaimed a bit too happily, and Isshin pressed his ear against the door again. _"Oh, look! I did it!"_

_"Yeah, me too! This damn thing looks far more complicated than…eh, what are you doing?" _Ichigo asked suddenly, and Isshin bite his lower lip. _"Err Inoue, I'm far more inexperienced than you in this stuff, so…what are you doing?"_

_"Ishida-kun said that if you do this, then you don't have to worry about it coming off again." _Orihime quickly explained, and Isshin heard the mattress move again. _"Can I show it, Kurosaki-kun?"_

_"Sure, I asked you to come here because I'm clueless about this stuff." _Ichigo confessed, and Orihime giggled at his words. _"Now, what the heck am I supposed to do with this thing?"_

_"Here, let me show you." _Orihime said, and the bed squeaked again, but no other sound followed it. And unfortunately, for Isshin, silence could only mean that something was going on inside the bedroom. _"See? It's not that hard. You just have to move it like this, and make sure you don't hurt yourself, Kurosaki-kun."_

_"Ah, well, that's easy." _Ichigo said suddenly, and the bed squeaked again. _"Man, I sure don't know what you and Ishida see in this. This is just so….I dunno, weird? I don't think I'll be doing this any time soon."_

_"I think you're doing a good job, Kurosaki-kun." _Orihime commented in her usual happy tone, _"Oh! That's very good! Very nice, Kurosaki-kun, you should continue like th-ouch!"_

_"What? What happened?"_

"_Hehe, nothing, just me being silly." _Orihime answered, and Isshin heard Ichigo sigh. _"I'm sorry, Kurosaki-kun, but you know I'm a klutz, and…"_

_"No, its okay, here, let me have a look." _ Ichigo interrupted, and once again, the mattress made a weird sound. _"Inoue, you should have told me you're bleeding!"_

_"What? No, it's okay Kurosaki-kun!" _Orihime exclaimed suddenly, and Isshin's mouth dropped when he heard the bed shake. _"There's no need for us to stop, really! This is nothing!"_

_"What do you mean, this is nothing, you…ah, damn it!"_Ichigo cursed, _"Man, this thing stings!"_

_"A-Are you okay, Kurosaki-kun?"_Orihime asked, _"Maybe we should stop." _

_"Tsk, this is fine, but I'll just go, and…"_the bed shifted again, but suddenly there was a small shout, and the sound of something heavy falling on the ground forced Isshin to rest a hand on the doorknob. What the hell was going on?

"_Ah, Kurosaki-kun!"_

_"Oh, I'm sorry Inoue, I'm just…ah man! Urgh! I can't do this!" _Ichigo said, in a rather tired tone. _"Are you okay, Inoue? Did I hurt you?"_

"_No, I…ah! I'm okay…" _Orihime groaned, and this time Isshin did get to his feet, his hand never leaving the doorknob. _"You know I have a hard head."_

_"Urgh, I'm sorry, I didn't…" _a moment of silence, "_Man, I think we should do something about this mess before my dad decides to show up. I really don't feel like explaining all this to him, right now."_

_"Uh, o-okay,"_ Orihime mumbled.

"_I'm sorry; I really shouldn't have asked you to do this." _Ichigo started after a short moment in silence. _"I never thought it would be this hard..."_

_"No, its okay, I…ahh!"_

"_Oi, Inoue!"_

And there was no need to say that on that moment, Kurosaki Isshin swung the door open, and flew inside, a kick well-aimed at his son.

"ICHIGO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

Since his son had been caught by surprise, Isshin managed to kick Ichigo right on the stomach, sending him flying to a wall. As he got to his feet, Isshin walked towards Ichigo, who was struggling to get up from the floor, and grabbed him by the collar.

"Ichigo, what were you doing with an innocent lady such as Orihime?" Isshin practically yelled at his son's ears, "I should have known it was suspicious for you to be locked inside your room with her! I didn't raise a son to be a pervert!"

"Shut up!" Ichigo yelled suddenly before punching Isshin on the chin, sending his father flying towards the door, "You maniac! What the hell are you doing in my room?"

"That's none of your business!" Isshin exclaimed as he got up to his feet, "I'm here to make sure that you don't do anything perverted in front of Orihime, y-"

It was then that Isshin looked at Orihime, and blinked when he saw her on the floor, surrounded by fabrics while, on the bed, was a doll and a football. There was also an open sewing kit on the mattress.

"I ask again, you daft man, what the hell are you doing in my room?" Ichigo asked while Orihime stood up from the floor, and started gathering the various fabrics. "Oh, I get it! You were eavesdropping weren't you?"

"You…You were sewing?" Isshin asked suddenly as he looked from Orihime to Ichigo, who went red in a matter of seconds. "Son, I never thought you were…you could have told me, you know? Sure this is a shock, but I would have given you all of my support in this important moment of your life."

"You idiot!!" Ichigo shouted suddenly, knowing very well about what his father was referring to, and ignoring the fact that Orihime was still present Ichigo kicked his father on the stomach. Then, he punched his father on the gut, and pushed him out of the room, closing the door behind him. "Bastard…"

"Err, Kurosaki-kun?" Orihime asked suddenly, and the orange haired boy looked at her only to see that she was still holding the fabrics, a thimble on her finger. "I-I…it's better to continue this some other day, ne? Your sisters birthday is next week, so we still have time to finish the doll's dress."

"Man, next time I'll just buy a doll, and quit this stupid idea of making something on my own." Ichigo sighed as he dropped his head, but he gazed up when he heard Orihime giggle. "But I really have to thank you, Inoue. Thanks for giving me a hand, despite of that crazy father of mine."

"I find him quite funny, actually." Orihime confessed with a bright smile, "But okay! I can come back later to help you finishing the dress for the doll! I'm sure Yuzu-chan will love it!"

"After all this," Ichigo looked at the fingers that had been like targets to the needle he had been trying to use, "she better love it to death!"

"I'm sure she will, Kurosaki-kun." Orihime said, still smiling brightly, and then she turned to the bed, and grabbed her bag. "Just tell me when you want me to come again!"

"Yeah, sure, no problem," Ichigo mumbled as he followed Orihime towards the door of his room, and then down to the first story of the house. "Just make sure Ishida never finds out, okay? I would never see the end of it."

"Okay, I won't tell him, but you know something, Kurosaki-kun?" Orihime asked as she put her shoes on, and then she looked at Ichigo again, who was staring at her with his usual scowl. "I think it's quite cute to see you doing a present for your sister."

With those words, Orihime said her goodbyes, and left the house, humming as she did. Ichigo, on the contrary, watched her until Orihime walked through the front gate. Then, he closed the door of his house, and turned around only to jump backwards when his father appeared from out of nowhere.

"Ichigo, you should have told me!" Isshin shouted, and Ichigo rested his hand on his father face in an attempt to keep him at a secure distance. "Why didn't you tell me you liked sewing? I would have asked Yuzu to play with you, and then Karin would have joined you as well, and I…"

"You idiot!" Ichigo shouted before grabbing his father collar, and send Isshin flying towards the kitchen. "Stay the hell away from me! And stay away from Inoue as well!"

As Ichigo's footsteps indicated that he was returning to his room, Isshin looked at Masaki's poster, and smiled at her.

"Ah, Masaki, I think I have found our son's future wife, and I think sewing will draw them together!"

**The End…**

26/11/07

I hope this wasn't as bad as I think it was! Thanks for reading it!


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